Warning: Armed and Dangerous

Notorious shmafia boss Bob "the british bulldog" Heightchew was last seen visiting his old and best friends and associates Andy "New Papi" Stockhoff, his wife Melissa "New Mami" Stockhoff and their newest son and heir to the family business, Noah Asher Stockhoff. Few people know the origins or activities of the british bulldog. He likes to keep his activities and business dealings to himself and not blog or talk to anyone. All that is known is that he got his name from a previous associate Landon Brock, commonly called...the lexus...and that recent reports suggest that he had been busy furthering the family's shmafia interests in Asia until a little over a week ago, when he resurfaced in the dirty south.

The joyous arrival of Noah has the shmafia family in a bustle to pay their respects to the little guy.

the trip took only a morning and the british bulldog's visit was one of great renunions and good times. All the normal shmafia rituals were well observed. Chick flicks, trips to target and wal-mart, and one amazing breakfast complete with turkey bacon, some well scrambled eggs, and the best french toast the bulldog had ever tasted. Only one final ritual was left to be carried out for the trip to be complete...Pizza and Buffalo wings! As New Papi and the Bulldog started out on the routine heist spirits were high! The plan was simple, Noah sleeps as usual as New Mami makes the call to Pizza hut. Simultaniously the Bulldog and New Papi would travel incognito to Pizza Hut for the pickup. The Bulldog, a master of confusion, would distract the staff while New Papi slipped the pizza out from under their noses.

"Yeah New Papi this is just like old times, the pizza hut won't know what hit them!"

"I know! We still got the touch like in the old days!"

Cruising down a country road, they made sure to stay under the speed limit the entire time. Cant let anything compromise this operation! They past what seemed like a harmless church of christ...or so they thought.

Little did they know that in the shadows lurked a policeman ready to pounce!

"Oh No! A policeman! No No this can't be happening!"

"Wait Wait don't panic! I don't think he saw us..."

Several agonizing seconds followed. The two thought they were in the clear when suddenly, the police car bolted after them!

Oh no! I knew it he sees us. Were never gonna make it!

Calm down! Don't be a wus. Make a break for it! Step on it Step on it! Here I'll take the tommy gun!

The policeman was hard on their heels when suddenly the bulldog had an idea!

Woah Woah hold on a second! Put the gun down! The last thing we need is a gunfight right now. I have an idea.

They pulled into the nearest church called "Kingdom Hall." The plan was simple, and desparate but it might just work! The Bulldog would use his skills of confusion while New Papi did his best to make it look like they were just a couple southern baptists going to church!

"Uh Hello officer! Just a few Army guys going to church...whats that? my lisence and registration? No problem. Proof of insurance? Wait I'm confused! I don't know where I put it or if I even have it? Do you remember seeing some insurance around here Papi?"

"Dropkick me jesus through the goalpost of Life!"

In the end the two fooled the officer who gave them only a warning. Whew that was a close one. The rest of the heist went off without a hitch and the crew all enjoyed Pizza and Buffalo wings together that night. Except for Noah of course who was sleeping....but really really cute.

Any information about the whereabouts of these two would be greatly appreciated and they should be considered armed and dangerous!